well.. i think i've lost hope for my knee.. went to hospital today.. thought i would start physio straight.. but after observations.. the doctor felt tt i tore my meniscus.. cant do much now.. huv to wait till 24/2 to do a MRI scan.. magnetic resonance imaging.. sounds cool right.. it costs very cool too.. $300++... anyway.. i think im gettin into depression state again.. makin considerations whether im able to continue in hockey.. and whether i should continue studyin.. im feelin damn down.. realise tt i've got many close frens.. but dunno hu to look to when im down.. i hate imposin others.. so.. i'll choose to think about everything myself..

anyway.. had a wonderful night last fri.. there was a mini seoul garden at my place and it was one of the most successful 05s06 outings ever.. sang karaoke.. played mahjong.. and played blackjack! i was quite lucky.. in the first round i already got blackjack and as the banker.. everyone had to pay me double! haha.. it was very fun la.. b4 tt.. it was pjc's open house.. went to help canoe to decor.. went over to hockey too to take photos.. ok.. but i left b4 the whole thing really started.. to prepare for the night..

seriously.. as im writin all this.. especially the part which im suppose to be happy.. i cant feel happiness at all.. well.. i noe i'll get back soon..

many things happened durin this week.. im retiring from my church choir.. and now im just a normal person who attends mass every sun.. i think tt durin this 3yrs in the choir.. i did went closer to god.. but drifted away from him even more.. i dunno la.. im just feelin very tired now.. i used to be a lively, active and jovial gal in my sec sch and i hardly cried at all.. now.. it's all diff.. im not as happy as b4 and cried many times.. i dunno hu i am anymore.. im so sorry for this post.. i feel guilty to let u ppl endure through my pathetic post which seems like im searchin for pity.. anyway.. all the best to everyone...


~what is the feeling of reuniting with GOD.. should i be looking forward to it..~