No hope, no expectation, no pain.

hi all! it's the new yr's eve's eve.. ok.. i noe tt's stupid.. anyway.. it's the last 2 days of 2008!!

hmm.. should i do a recap?? alright.. briefly sum up..

in the beginning of the yr, i was still a monash college student, waiting to do my 2nd semester exams.. after tt, was a frenzy of applying for monash uni.. the whole process was a torture! it was so not efficient and slow.. well.. blame it on both parts..

results were out and the application process started.. wanted to go back into relief teachin but i guess there was some communication breakdown and i ended up workin at NLS. the experience at nls wasnt tt bad.. i saw a diff type of education system and learnt how to appreciate more of wat i had. started workin ard mid feb.. was there for near 2 mths.. met diff ppl and learnt even more diff perspective. it was really a memorable experience. even though the pay wasnt tt good, well.. and i had to travel so far every mornin, i learnt new things.

a diff step i took durin this period was signing up for aikido classes! i've always wanted to do aikido and had nvr step forward to do it as it was freakin expensive! well.. i paid for 3 mths and i really did like mad durin my remainin time in spore.. i got my 6th kyu in just 2 mths! lol!

durin the stint at nls, was oso busy preparin for my trip to aussie.. time really flew by and in no time, we said our goodbyes to nls at the end of may..

in the beginnin of june, it was a frenzy.. buyin stuff, preparin myself, meetin up wif ppl, packing of bags.. well.. and of cuz, my farawell and birthday party.. it was oso considered as my early '21st' birthday as i wun be in spore in 2009 to celebrate my 21st..

got back into contact wif my pri sch frens and hola.. i invited them too, to my party.. it was really a great one as all my love ones were present and those who couldn make it, they sent me their regards :) it was oso a memorable birthday as i celebrated wif my bro!! it was actually held on his actual birthday.. haha! it has been soo long since we celebrated our birthdays together..

before long, i was gettin ready for my flight.. on the 23rd jun 2008, saritha and i was sent away by all our family members and friends.. i was fightin to keep my tears.. so determine not to let it drop but in the end, it rolled down... lol.. my stupid frens even bet on whether i would tear! haha! it was a change in my life i guess..

24th jun 2008, i started my new life in melbourne, aus.. i cant sae tt life has been smooth for us but all i can sae is God really took good care of us.. we met fantastic frens whom im sure would be frens for life.. learnt our lessons through our daily routines.. stayed over 6 places in melb!! 6 ok!!! it's crazy la... started sch.. experienced winter.. met flasher, met burglar... my life is crazy...

i had my fair share of fun too! royal melb show, tulip fest, singapore day, birthday celebrations wif frens, road trips, shoppings and eating!! all in all.. it's not tt bad afterall.. i've alot of freedom to do whatever i wan but at the same time, i huv yet to learn to break through the barrier i huv in me.. the barrier which makes me take a step back whenever i wanna step forward..

frens part.. i really really do love all my frens!! frens in spore and frens i've made in aus.. to my frens in spore, u guys really gave me alot of strength and courage whenever u listen to me rant and complain over the emails and msn.. it really meant alot to me.. just a simple email really brightens up my day.. and to all the frens whom i've made in aus, u guys rocks!!! being there for me and saritha when lousy things happen really gave us the strength and knowledge tt we'll always huv ppl to lean back on.. stupid things we do, studyin and muggin sessions, funny things we laugh.. haha! it was really great fun! i dun need frens to go clubbing or partyin wif.. im just thankful tht the frens i huv are ppl whom i noe i can trust and huv fun wif :)

of cuz, to my beloved parents, i doubt they'd read this but anyway, i love them alot! just tt i wouldn noe how to express it.. i'll change my attitude towards them and i'll pray that they'll understand what im really gg through and that i'll understand how they feel to.. to my bro, u're the best :) it says it all.. even though at times u're so annoying.. but i still do love u alot :)

after spendin 5mths in aus, here i am, back in spore, tryin to get in touch wif as many ppl as possible, from pri, sec, jc, college.. wherever i've met u.. hehe.. i huv to learn how to open myself up to.. even though i'd like to meet everyone, i'll still quite hold back as i'll still huv the thinkin tt ppl are judgin me.. im learnin hoe to ignore the judgment and be happy wif myself.. tt is when i can huv real happiness..

my holiday in spore so far has been great.. no stress no worries.. im learnin and huv realised tt in life, at certain time, it's better to huv no hope and no expectation so that there would not be any pain.. i guess this could apply to the love part of my life.. it seems kinda empty.. but i huv love everywhere to fill it so im not expecting any much for this part of my life.. as a 20 yr old kid, lady, gal.. whatever, i just wanna be happy and live life the way i wan it to be.

in this new yr, i wish for happiness and health for everyone i noe and care for and may the new yr be a great one ahead!

goodbye 2008 and hello 2009!!


~no hope, no expectation, no pain..~